Ode to 2012

Well the Mayans were wrong.

We’re still here.

This year has been an extremely difficult year for the Ford household.

Evelyn had a couple of hospital stays and emergency abdominal surgery and I had emergency eye surgery for a detached retina.

Oh, and the surgeries were about 2 weeks apart.

The whole house had the flu during the Christmas season.

The doctor/surgery bills sucked up all the money we had set back for the holidays and to celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary.

But you know what?

We’re still here.

We’re still standing.

We’re still together.

And as for the year 2012, there’s a Cee Lo Green song out there you need to listen to.

It starts with an “F” and ends with “You”.

I’m moving on to 2013.  

 

Happy New Year!

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Something" from "Bones [Original TV Soundtrack]" by "Cary Brothers"

Books I “Read” In 2012

I’m not sure if I should use “read” since a lot of these were audiobooks that I listened to.
I started to use the word “enjoyed” but  then I would need to delete some off the list.
So the all-purpose term “read” is going to have to do.

• 420 Characters by Lou Beach
• A Christmas Story: The Book That Inspired the Hilarious Classic Film by Jean Shepherd (Audio)
• A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole (Audio)
• A Dish Taken Cold by Anne Perry
• A Fatal Twist of Lemon (Wisteria Tearoom Mysteries) by Patrice Greenwood
• An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge and Other Stories by Ambrose Bierce (Audio)
• Catching Fire (The Hunger Games, Book 2) by Suzanne Collins (Audio)
• Chopsticks by Jessica Anthony and Rodrigo Corral
• Crusade by Greg Crites (Audio)
• DEAD(ish) by Naomi Kramer
• Death Warmed Over (Dan Shamble, Zombie P.I.) by Kevin J. Anderson
• Double Indemnity by James M. Cain
• Fool: A Novel by Christopher Moore (Audio)
• In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks: And Other Complaints from an Angry Middle-Aged White Guy by Adam Carolla (Audio)
• In Search of #6 by Damon Timm (Audio)
• Killing Floor: A Jack Reacher Novel by Lee Child
• Life As We Knew It by Susan Beth Pfeffer (Audio)
• Life's Little Annoyances: True Tales of People Who Just Can't Take It Anymore by Ian Urbina (Audio)
• Mockingjay (The Hunger Games, Book 3) by Suzanne Collins (Audio)
• Playing for Pizza by John Grisham (Audio)
• Practical Demonkeeping by Christopher Moore (Audio
• Reader's Advisory: Unshelved 7 (An Unshelved Collection) by Gene Ambaum and Bill Barnes
• Signspotting 4: The Art of Miscommunication by Doug Lansky
• Smut: Stories by Alan Bennett
• Starting from Happy: A Novel by Patricia Marx
• Thank You Notes 2 by Jimmy Fallon
• Thank You Notes by Jimmy Fallon and the Writers of Late Night
• The Adjustment Bureau by Philip K. Dick and Phil Gigante (Audio)
• The Age of Miracles: A Novel by Karen Thompson Walker
• The Art of Letting Go: Living the Wisdom of St. Francis by Richard Rohr (Audio)
• The Art of Procrastination: A Guide to Effective Dawdling, Lollygagging and Postponing by John Perry
• The Bro Code by Barney Stinson (Audio)
• The Call of the Wild by Jack London (Audio)
• The Complete Grimm's Fairy Tales by Brothers Grimm
• The Conference of the Birds by Peter Sis
• The Darkest Evening of the Year by Dean Koontz (Audio
• The Dead and the Gone (The Last Survivors, Book 2) by Susan Beth Pfeffer (Audio)
• The Enemy: A Reacher Novel by Lee Child (Audio)
• The Galton Case: A Lew Archer Mystery by Ross Macdonald (Audio)
• The Instant Physicist: An Illustrated Guide by Richard A. Muller and Joey Manfre
• The Lost Years by Mary Higgins Clark (Audio)
• The Memoir Project: A Thoroughly Non-Standardized Text for Writing & Life by Marion Roach Smith
• The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch by Philip K. Dick
• There, I Fixed It: (No, You Didn't) by Cheezburger Network
• Too Much Coffee Man: Cutie Island by Shannon Wheeler
• What Do You Want to Do Before You Die? by The Buried Life, Ben Nemtin, Dave Lingwood and Duncan Penn
• Wonderstruck by Brian Selznick
• Zombie Spaceship Wasteland: A Book by Patton Oswalt by Patton Oswalt (Audio)

48 books in all. I think that’s a record for me.


Blogger Labels: Books

Death Warmed Over (Dan Shamble, Zombie P.I.) by Kevin J. Anderson

 

 

“Sitting stiffly at my desk – these days I’m usually stiff, no matter what I do; the aftereffects of rigor mortis are a bitch – I ponder the loose threads of investigations under way, figuring out how the evidence tied together.”

-Dan Shamble, Zombie P.I.

The Instant Physicist: An Illustrated Guide by Richard A. Muller and Joey Manfre

 

   A quick and very informative read.

No need to be a scientist to enjoy this book, it is written in simple terms and explains a lot of physics in just 139 pages.

Everything from the radioactivity to the greenhouse effect. It’s a great book for trivia buffs or you could just use it to impress your friends.

I would have to say it was:

 

 

Random sentence

The Statue of Liberty is not as tall as many people think – 151 feet from the base to the tip of the torch.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Saturn Return" from "Reveal" by "R.E.M."

The Conference of the Birds by Peter Sis

 

I have to admit that understanding the hidden meanings in poetry is a weak point of mine.

I sort of got the gist of this one. It is a story of man’s search for meaning told through the eye’s of birds in search of their god.

Make sure you read the hard back version because the illustrations are just beautiful.

 

Random sentence

The endless deserts are crystals of sand.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Backdoor Medley: Backdoor Love Affair/Mellow Down Easy/Backdoor Love" from "Six Pack [Disc 2]" by "ZZ Top"

The Art of Procrastination: A Guide to Effective Dawdling, Lollygagging and Postponing by John Perry

 

  It was like looking in a mirror.

If you are, live with, or work with a procrastinator, this is the book for you.

It discusses a condition known as “structured procrastination.”

I swear the guy followed me around and took notes.

 

Random Sentence

Other stuff – some opened, some unopened – piled up toward the back of the desk to be dealt with “later.”

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " My Private Nation" from "My Private Nation" by "Train"

Smut: Stories by Alan Bennett

 

This book is comprised of two ok stories about sexual exploits.

It was not really my cup of tea (British pun intended) and leaned a little too far to the erotic side.

But it was really satisfying to be able to answer the question, “What are you reading?”

“Smut”

 

Random Sentence

It had been a holiday from respectability and not to be repeated, a one-off, the chance of her coming across any other lodgers as open-minded (and penurious) as Andy and Laura very slim.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Open Wide" from "Backwater - single" by "Meat Puppets"

The Adjustment Bureau by Philip K. Dick and Phil Gigante

 

Random sentence:

"What will the eight-fifteen summons bring?"

Dick, Philip K.. Adjustment Team (Kindle Locations 32-33).  . Kindle Edition.

In Search of #6 by Damon Timm

 

Random sentence:

Shouldn't there be cake and ice cream and candles and soft songs of victory and a few cleverly crafted paragraphs describing the encounter and the post-kiss victory dance?

Timm, Damon. In Search of #6 (Kindle Locations 176-177).  . Kindle Edition.

Starting from Happy: A Novel by Patricia Marx

 

Favorite quote:

“It took me a long time to learn I was a fast learner.”

-Wally Yez

Colorado Wildfire Photos: The Waldo Canyon Fire in Colorado SpringsPlog Photo Blog

Colorado Wildfire Photos: The Waldo Canyon Fire in Colorado SpringsPlog Photo Blog

They say a picture is worth a thousand words.
These are worth a million.
There is no way I could accurately describe the feelings and emotions being felt as we watched this unfold yesterday. It was just so surreal and unnerving.

Note to everyone out there: Trust those in charge when you are involved in a natural disaster. If they tell you to leave your home, leave.
Your life is their #1 priority. It should be yours.

Houses can be rebuilt but "homes" are harder especially if you or part of your family are not there because you thought you could save your property with a garden hose.

Thanks to the Denver Post for this gallery.

Thanks to all the firefighters for all their hard work.

Scruples Question #7

 

Uhmmmmm…..no.

I live in Colorado Springs, CO. (Population: approx. 430,000)

You know, that quiet little hamlet nestled between the plains and Pikes Peak… where at least once or twice a week there’s a shooting or a brawl.

And I’m not just talkin’ about at the bars, folks. I talkin’ about in the neighborhoods and on the streets.

Colorado Springians (or is it Springites?) have a severe problem with “Old West” mentality. They would prefer to settle their differences in the middle of the street at high noon.

Spurs janglin’ , tumbleweeds rolling by, etc.…

No sense talking about it. Just pull out your piece and open fire.

Have a little too much to drink, get disoriented and accidently try your neighbor’s door?

Bang! Bang! You’re on your way to the hospital.

In 2011, there were 32 homicides in “the Springs”.

In 2010, your odds of becoming a victim of a violent crime were 4.7 in 1000.

Now before you NRA members get the wrong idea and think that I’m advocating the government taking away your weapons, I’m not.

I believe you have the right to bear arms and protect your loved ones or yourself. I don’t believe you need an AK47 or another type of automatic weapon to do that.

A handgun or shot gun should do nicely. Also I said to protect you or your loved ones.

There’s no sane reason to open fire because someone scratched your car.

That’s what insurance is for. And besides it’s just a car. It’s not worth someone’s life and you spending yours in prison.

With all that said. I like Colorado Springs.

Most of it.

The weather’s great. It’s just about the right size city. Not too big, not too small. I have some good friends here. The mountains are right there. 

I would recommend it to anyone. You just have to know a few things:

1. There ain’t nothing you need in the neighborhood around Fountain and Murray. You just found the best deal ever on Craigslist? Screw it. You can live without it.
2. Don’t make eye contact.
3. Keep your head down.
4. Just smile and nod.
5. Don’t touch other people’s stuff.

#5 is the reason your battery is going to run down if you leave your lights on.

Sorry.

 

 

Disclaimer

The game, A Question of Scruples is owned and copyrighted by High Game Enterprises. All questions posted here are from the 1986 version of the game which was copyrighted by the Milton Bradley Co. (now Hasbro).

I have no official ties to High Game Enterprises or Hasbro and I am not receiving any compensation for these posts.

My only hope is that they have a sense of humor and don’t sue my ass over this.

See definition of sarcasm here.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Superfly" from "Instant Party: Whole Lotta Soul" by "Curtis Mayfield"

Wakey! Wakey!

 

This morning as I was eating my McDonalds breakfast when I looked down at the bag that held the hash browns and saw this:

Immediately my mind went to the TV show “My Name Is Earl” and Earl’s infamous line as he tried to get his brother Randy out of bed:

"Wakey, wakey, hands off snakey."

Then I imagined how this marketing scheme came to be.

Picture a marketing team sweating out ideas while an upper level executive hounds them for results but at the same time rejects all the decent ones.

Suddenly one of the frustrated and fed up ad guys throws out “Wakey! Wakey!

The clueless exec loves it. “Go with it!”, he yells.

The ad guy just sits back and smiles smugly knowing that millions of people are not going to associate the phrase with hash browns.

That’s my theory. Let’s hear yours.

Goodbye Picture of the Day

 

What picture of the day?

Come on, I know you thought it.

Back in March I decided to take a picture a day and post it. It was supposed to be a year long project.

That lasted 6 days and then my laptop died. So after fixing that problem, I decided to just post a picture a day from my archives.

That lasted 13 days.

Sadly with my work schedule, school schedule and a desire to spend my free time with my wife, I just don’t have the time.

So here is lame fix #2.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/tgford

There are some really good shots here (most of them by mistake) and some really crappy stuff (my usual quality of work).

I hope you enjoy them and would really like to hear your comments (good or bad).

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Favorite Year" from "Taking the Long Way" by "Dixie Chicks"

Scruples Question #6

 

“No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.”

-Fifth Amendment of the United States Constitution-

 

 

Disclaimer

The game, A Question of Scruples is owned and copyrighted by High Game Enterprises. All questions posted here are from the 1986 version of the game which was copyrighted by the Milton Bradley Co. (now Hasbro).

I have no official ties to High Game Enterprises or Hasbro and I am not receiving any compensation for these posts.

My only hope is that they have a sense of humor and don’t sue my ass over this.

See definition of sarcasm here.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " The Steamroller (Infinity in Music)" from "Fresh Aire 8" by "Mannheim Steamroller"

Let’s fire this thing back up!

 

Ok, maybe not today….

I’ve got a friend who has issued a challenge to people she knows to revive or start their blogs by posting something everyday in June.

I thought what a great idea since I have been so lax with mine lately.

So all day long I have been thinking of ideas and subjects to write about and here it is 9:55pm on June 1st and I’m too exhausted to recall even one of those ideas.

So here is my lame attempt at the 1st post of the challenge.

 

Good Night…ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Be a good neighbor

 

“Be a good neighbor. If you have a neighbor that breaks their daily routine, go knock on their door and make sure they're okay. Even if you don't know them very well, all you have to ask is "are you okay?" It could make all the difference in the world.” – My wife Evelyn via her Facebook page.

This post is for my next door neighbor Mark.

Here’s what I know about Mark.

He is in his mid 60’s, retired, friendly, extremely intelligent, works his ass off and is probably the best neighbor anyone could hope to have.

I first met Mark when he knocked on our door not too long after we moved in and let me know that he needed to put in a double wide gate so he could get his new boat in the backyard but in order to do that he would need to replace the front panels between our houses.

“No problem” I said “just let me know when you start so I can help.”

The next Saturday morning I heard some hammering and went to investigate.  Mark had already pulled up all the old posts, reset new ones and had most of the fence panels up.

I noticed that the gate post at the fence line and the one next to his house were not in line and mentioned it to him. He launched into a detailed explanation of the angle the gate needed to swing in order to allow for a wider opening so the boat would go through, etc..

I knew then that I was out of my league so I just gave him money for half the materials and let him have at it.

I did the same thing when he let me know our shared mailbox post was beginning to rot and needed to be replaced. So for about $80 dollars I got a custom built mailbox post reinforced with flat iron running down each side. Oh yeah, it is also perfectly level which is something I would never have been able to accomplish.

Mark continues to work diligently around his house and is even remodeling the inside.

Mark is a very private person. I mean we talk whenever we see each other but it is never about anything personal. I have no idea if he is divorced, widowed, or has any family.

Mark is very routine oriented. I may not see him for a couple of weeks at a time but I know he is around. His trashcan is always right next to the mailbox on Wednesday afternoon even though the pickup is not until Thursday morning and he never brings it back up to the house until Thursday afternoon.

That was my first sign.

I came home from school on Wednesday night and the trashcan wasn’t out. I thought maybe he had forgot which hasn’t happened in 5 years or maybe he wasn’t home.

When I went to work on Thursday morning there was a package on his front porch. It was still there Friday morning. It was still there Friday evening when I got home.

I knew then.

I called his house. No answer.

I checked his mailbox. Crammed full.

Evelyn and I knocked on his door. No answer.

I talked to the neighbor on the other side of Mark. He hadn’t seen Mark in about a week or so.

Damn it!

We called the police.

Here’s something else I know about Mark.

He died sometime between last Thursday afternoon when he pulled his trashcan in and last night when the police entered his house via the garage and found him in bed with the TV on.

He died alone.

No family or friends around.

I now know he has a son in Texas, a sister in California, a brother and mother in Illinois.

I should have knocked on his door when his trash wasn’t out. I should have…

Rest in peace Mark.

Thank you for being a great neighbor.

P.O.T.D.–April 13, 2012

 

Happy Hippo!

P.O.T.D.–April 12, 2012

 

P.O.T.D.–April 11, 2012

 

P.O.T.D.–April 10, 2012

 

Chuffy at the Silver Saddle Motel in Santa Fe, NM

P.O.T.D.–April 9, 2012

 

Ok, I know this isn’t really in the framework of the Picture Of The Day since I didn’t take this photo but I just couldn’t resist posting this.

How the heck did I ever stand to wear my hair this long with a full beard. My hair today is only a 3rd of this length and it’s driving me crazy.

P.O.T.D.- April 8, 2012

 

Easter Past

 

P.O.T.D–April 7, 2012

 

Winter In The Garden Of The Gods

P.O.T.D.–April 6, 2012

 

P.O.T.D.–April 5, 2012

 

Victor, CO

P.O.T.D–April 4, 2012

 

Monster Icicle

P.O.T.D–April 3, 2012

 

Zion National Park, UT

P.O.T.D.–April 2, 012

 

Fremont Street, Las Vegas, NV

P.O.T.D–April 1, 2012

 

Mueller State Park, CO

Picture of the Day–FAIL!

 

If you haven’t noticed, there hasn’t been a picture of the day since March 20th.

So here come the excuses. 

I knew this would be tough for me since my life consists of the following routine nearly everyday:

Wake up, go to work, go home, eat, sleep, repeat.

Nothing changes, same route, same day, over and over.

Then my laptop died (see last photo) and the routine became:

Wake up, go to work, go home, eat, cuss laptop, replace hard drive, cuss laptop, reformat hard drive, cuss laptop because Windows is corrupt, reinstall Windows Vista, cuss laptop because drivers won’t load, copy cloned image to hard drive, cuss laptop because cloned image is corrupt, purchase and install Windows 7, sleep.

This went on over the course of 6 days.

So now that this ordeal has been resolved I should be able to get back to my photo challenge, right?

Probably not.

I start school on Monday and my routine will be:

Wake up, go to work, go to school, maybe eat, maybe sleep, repeat.

So here’s my lame solution. The challenge was supposed to be take a picture a day and post it. Instead I will be posting pictures from my archives. I can still say I took them and there are some really great shots, they just won’t be new.

So here’s one for today. I hope you like it.

It’s almost a self portrait.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to " Deep in the Heart [*]" from "The Joshua Tree [20th Anniversary 2-CD] Disc 2" by "U2"

Picture of the Day - March 20, 2012

This can't be good.

Picture of the Day–March 19, 2012

 

Ok, so they aren’t photos and I didn’t take them, I scanned them.

I was a little lazy today.

These are the birthday cards I received this year.

The Age of Miracles: A Novel by Karen Thompson Walker

A LibraryThing Review

 

The Earth’s rotation has rapidly slowed and the days are getting longer, much longer but 12 year old Julia’s life is still going at full speed.

In spite of the tragedies going on around her she still hangs onto the hope that she will be accepted at school by the other kids and that someday Seth Moreno will notice her. She worries about her parent’s health and their relationship. She also dreams of growing up to live a long life.

This is a well written coming of age story set against a backdrop of world apocalypse.

But don’t expect the usual zombies and such. This is a well researched and scientifically sound end of the world scenario. The “slowing” has affected everything from the tides and weather patterns to the food supplies to human emotions. The story also delves into human psychology and the fight for survival instinct by exploring the clash between “real-timers” and “clock-timers”.

The quick switches in the story from calm to panic, from good times to tragedy, and then back again kept me glued to the pages waiting to see what would happen next.

I was lucky enough to receive an advanced reader’s copy of this book so I didn’t have to wait until its release in June of 2012. I highly recommend you order a copy for yourself today.

Picture of the Day–March 18, 2012

 

 

I spent my Sunday immersed in a good book.

Picture of the Day–March 17, 2012

“Road Through Despair”

 

Today Evelyn and I drove down CO 67 from Decker, CO to Woodland Park, CO.

I had not been down this road since before the Hayman fire.

This is just a small portion of the total 138,144 acres burned.

Over 130 homes destroyed.  Over 5000 people evacuated.

6 fatalities.

Oh yeah, and it happened 10 years ago.

We spent the months of June and July of 2002 watching the glow and smoke of the fire from our balcony.

 

 

I can’t begin to describe all the emotions and feelings I had driving through the “forest” today.

The first was total disbelief.

I mean the damage is unreal. There is very little new growth which means very little wildlife.

Speaking of wildlife, I can’t imagine how many animals, birds, etc.. were lost in the fire.

Next was extreme sadness followed by anger.

Anger?

Yes anger.

This wasn’t some accident, a spark from a train wheel, or a lightening strike.

This was arson.

By a U.S. Forest Service Employee….who wanted to be the hero for reporting the fire and saving the forest.

10 years later it still makes me mad.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "Resistance" from "Catch and Release [Soundtrack]" by "Alaska!"

Picture of the Day–March 16, 2012

 

“Big Boy” by Wilbur Craig

Wilbur's 6 foot long steam locomotive, "Big Boy," is on exhibition at the Cheyenne, Wyoming Depot Museum. It has approximately 8,000 parts and was created from photographs of the real locomotive sitting in the Cheyenne railroad yard. Many parts move and it can be taken apart and reassembled.

(borrowed straight from Mr. Craig’s website.)

See more of his work at http://www.woodartinmotion.com/index.html

Picture of the Day–March 15, 2012

 

Stratton’s Independence Mine and Mill

Victor, CO

Be A Superhero!

Ok, I’m shaving my head again this year to raise money to fight childhood cancer.

We all know somebody who has lost the battle to cancer. All types of cancer.

You know who they were.

Was it Mom or Dad?

Your best friend?

Your partner in life?

I lost both my parents, my grandfather, a couple of aunts and uncles and others.

It hurts to be so helpless.

All of those I’ve lost were diagnosed as adults. They had a chance to live full lives.

How old were your loved ones?

Can you imagine being 4 years old and having to fight something like this?

Alone?

I can’t either. That’s why I’ve decided to participate again this year.

 

So with all that said, I’ve got a couple of challenges for you.

1. Donate at http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/participantid/521478 and be a hero for these kids.

2. Find a local event in your area and participate. Be a hero for the kids.

 

I know what you’re thinking. What if I feel uncomfortable? What if someone laughs at me?

What if I don’t look good?

Guys, you know you’ll look good and macho with a shaved head.

And ladies, you’ll look hot too. Or if you don’t want to shave your head and have long hair, why not donate to Locks of Love?

All these questions ran through my mind last year too.

But after I participated and realized how much I was helping the kids I didn’t give a damn what anyone thought. I felt good.

So help the kids out and make yourself feel like the best person on earth.

Believe me it’s worth it.

 

Donate here:

http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/participantid/521478

http://www.locksoflove.org/

 

Come on. Be a hero.

New Year resolutions update

It’s March 10th. In 5 days it will be March 15th. My 49th birthday. In 1 year and 5 days I will be 50.

Good Gawd!

With that in mind, I thought I would revisit my New Year resolutions and see how I was doing. A sort of quarterly review if you please.

You can read the full resolution post here.

 The motto, Be Positive – Be Healthy – Be Active – I have managed to be more positive so far this year and I have adjusted my eating habits to become more healthy. Being active is still a challenge because over the last couple of months I have been dealing with some chronic fatigue-like issues. Quite frankly, there are some days all I want to do is sleep.

The Resolutions:

Less elevators –  Failing so far.

Less sweets -  Doing ok in this area. I’ve had a lot less cookies and such lately. I also gave up all soft drinks for Lent and am planning to keep that up after Easter. (side note to those of you who know me: No hell has not frozen over and I am not going back to church. I just think the idea of giving up something for Lent is a good idea.)

Less web surfing – Failed. But there is hope on the horizon. I have recently began pursuing funding for school and plan on going for Microsoft Certification in the very near future which will take up all my spare time.

More writing\blogging – I guess I’m about the same on this one but I have a few projects in mind that should help me out with this.

Less procrastination – Overall, I think I’m doing better with this. We’ll just have to wait and see.

More photography – So far this year I have only been out shooting once but I have a plan for that as well. I thought since this is my last year in my 40’s, I would commemorate it so I have accepted a “365” challenge and will be taking a photo each day starting on March 15th, my birthday, and ending on March 15, 2013. I’ll try to post them each day but if I get behind I will make sure they are posted by the end of each week.

Reengage – This has turned out to be my biggest goal for this year and I am diligently working on it.

 

So that’s it for now. Come back next week for the photo of the day. I’ll try to get a separate page set up so I can post all the photos on one place.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "I Love You (Original Performance Series)" from "Emotion” by "Martina McBride"

420 Characters by Lou Beach

***WARNING! THIS POST CONTAINS LANGUAGE WHICH MAY BE INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN.****

 

  This is one awesome book. It is a collection of short stories which are actually Facebook status updates. According to the author’s note, each entry is limited to 420 characters, including letters, spaces, and punctuation.

I know, you’re thinking that this must be really boring but it’s not.

Unlike this blog, each story\update is quite descriptive and entertaining. Some are serious, some are funny, and to be honest, I just didn’t get a few of them. But don’t let that stop you from reading it.

Here is one of my favorites which can be found on page 17:

“ARE YOU MY MOMMY?” said the little blue egg. “No, dear. You are a plastic trinket full of sweets,” said the brown hen. “My baby is over there,” and she pointed to a pink marshmallow chick being torn apart and devoured by a toddler. The hen screamed and woke up, her pillow wet with sweat, the sheets twisted around her legs. “Christ, I hate that dream.” She reached for a smoke.

I thought about trying to write this post in 420 characters but I’m not that good and I don’t think I could do the book justice in a review that short.

I checked this out from the library but it may end up on my “to buy” list for Christmas since I have some friends who would really enjoy it. You’ve been warned. I would recommend you pick up a copy from your local bookseller or at Amazon.com (http://www.amazon.com/420-Characters-Lou-Beach/dp/0547617933/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1328943464&sr=8-1).

Ok, here’s one more from page 124:

She sat on the porch in the old rocker, back and forth, back and forth, tried to puzzle out her feelings. The paperboy hit her in the knee with the Times. She kept on rocking. Kids ran by, the UPS truck rumbled past, a dog shat on her lawn. She just kept rocking, thinking. The sun went down, cars pulled into driveways. Her husband climbed the steps. “Hi, hon.” He put down his briefcase. “Fuck you, Larry!” she said.

After cleaning up the drink I spewed all over the place, all I could think of were the immortal words of Seinfeld’s Kenny Bania:

“That's gold Jerry! GOLD!”

 

 

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "D.A.N.C.E." from "D.A.N.C.E. - Single of the Week" by "Justice"

Chinese say what?

We ordered Chinese takeout last night and this was my fortune.

“It could be better, but its good enough.”

What the?!

This is probably one of the worst fortunes I’ve ever seen.

It’s even worse if you add one of the parlor game endings such as “in bed” or “between the sheets”. Talk about an ego killer.

I like to think of it as truth in advertising because it was really a testament to the quality of the food.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "Something's Changed" from "100 Days, 100 Nights [Promo Version]" by "Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings"

Another One Rides The Bus

This is going to be fun.

Comcast\Xfinity recently started offering “Readable Voicemails”. Ok, I shouldn’t say recently because they have been advertising it for the last 6-8 months but it actually hasn’t started working until about 2 weeks ago.

Readable voicemails are actually emails which include a text transcript of your voicemail message. So now when someone calls my house and leaves a message, Comcast’s voice recognition system translates it and emails it to me. If you have ever used voice recognition software then you know how well this is going to turn out. In Comcast’s defense, the service is free and they do add a disclaimer stating that “transcription services are not error free and the accuracy of the transcription can be affected by a number of factors”.

Here are the first ones that I received. I blacked out some parts for privacy reasons and added the corrections with red font in honor of an old boss who always used a red pen to correct my reports. (You know who you are)

 

From: "Comcast Digital Voice" <ComcastDigitalVoice@comcast.net>
To: <           @comcast.net>
Subject: You have a new Voicemail for Xfinity number 719-     -       
Date: Tuesday, January 31, 2012 7:47 PM

You have a new Voicemail message from: Unknown.

You have a new voice message in your mailbox. This message could not be transcribed due to bad audio quality (This was 6 seconds of music playing)

Do more on the go with the XFINITY Mobile App.

Access your email, voicemail, check your bill, and see who is calling your home phone - all from your iPhone, iPad, iPod Touch, Android, or BlackBerry device.

Visit www.xfinity.com/mobile to learn more about the XFINITY Mobile App

** This is an automatically generated email message - please do not reply. **

---

From: "Comcast Digital Voice" <ComcastDigitalVoice@comcast.net>
To: <         @comcast.net>
Subject: You have a new Voicemail for Xfinity number 719-   -   

Date: Monday, January 30, 2012 11:45 AM

You have a new Voicemail message from: 719-785-9000.

"This message is for     this is Susan with Ann med (Penrad) imaging. If you could please give us a call at seven eight five nine thousand. Please use option one. We are here Monday through Friday from seven thirty to five thirty. Once again this is pen med (Penrad) imaging seven eight five nine thousand. Please choose option one and anyone here can help you. Thank you."

Do more on the go with the XFINITY Mobile App.

Access your email, voicemail, check your bill, and see who is calling your home phone - all from your iPhone, iPad, iPod Touch, Android, or BlackBerry device.

Visit www.xfinity.com/mobile to learn more about the XFINITY Mobile App

** This is an automatically generated email message - please do not reply. **

---

From: "Comcast Digital Voice" <ComcastDigitalVoice@comcast.net>
To: <          @comcast.net>
Subject: You have a new Voicemail for Xfinity number 719-    -      

Date: Tuesday, January 31, 2012 9:28 AM

You have a new Voicemail message from: 719-785-9000.

"Hi this message is for        this is a test of a ten-not-imaging(?) (a message from Penrad Imaging)please return our call at your earliest convenience at seven eight five nine thousand. Our office hours are Monday through Friday seven thirty to five thirty. Again that number is seven eight five nine thousand. Option one."

Do more on the go with the XFINITY Mobile App.

Access your email, voicemail, check your bill, and see who is calling your home phone - all from your iPhone, iPad, iPod Touch, Android, or BlackBerry device.

Visit www.xfinity.com/mobile to learn more about the XFINITY Mobile App

** This is an automatically generated email message - please do not reply. **

---

And for the young ones out there, the title of this post in a reference to the Queen song “Another One Bites The Dust”.

More to come. I’m sure.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "You & Me (Acoustic)" from "All You Need Is Love" by "Dave Matthews Band"

Does your manager know you do that?

I went to one of our local Barnes & Noble stores today looking for a book that was recommended to me but I couldn’t remember the whole title or the author’s full name.

So after a while of perusing the shelves on my own with no luck, I finally broke down and went to ask for help.

Now, I work at a library and I know what it’s like to be asked to help find an item when the patron can barely remember the subject matter much less the title or the author’s name.

It went something like this:

Me: I work at a library so I know what it’s like to get vague request for items when the person can’t remember the title but…

Clerk: (blank stare)

Me: I’m looking for “Reinventing Yourself” or something like that and the author’s last name is Young. Sorry, that’s all I can remember.

Clerk: (blank stare)

He then proceeds to log onto Amazon.com to do a title\author search.

WHAT?!?!

I could have sworn I heard a needle drag across a LP and then nothing but crickets. I almost ran outside to read the sign on the building to make sure which store I was really in.

After locating the correct title and verifying it with me, he then logged on to B&N to check their inventory.

Clerk: We currently do not have the item but I can have one held for you.

Me: Can I just go online and order it myself?

Clerk: Yes

Me: Thanks

So I went out and got in the car, move it to a spot close to the building so I could connect to B&N’s wi-fi, turned on my Kindle and logged into Amazon.com and ordered the book.

It should be delivered to my house in 2 days with free shipping.

Hey, if it’s good enough for Barnes and Noble, it’s good enough for me.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "Hopeless" from "Drops of Jupiter" by "Train"

Scruples Question #5

 

Sure I would.

It’s the year 2012.

Where else are you going to find a cassette player now days.

And $20 is a great price.

And just because it’s a street vendor doesn’t mean it’s stolen.

And we should support local businesses, right?

 

Disclaimer

The game, A Question of Scruples is owned and copyrighted by High Game Enterprises. All questions posted here are from the 1986 version of the game which was copyrighted by the Milton Bradley Co. (now Hasbro).

I have no official ties to High Game Enterprises or Hasbro and I am not receiving any compensation for these posts.

My only hope is that they have a sense of humor and don’t sue my ass over this.

See definition of sarcasm here.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "Say What!" from "Live at Montreux 1982 & 1985 Disc 2" by "Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble"

Looking forward to 2012…More or Less

Ok, here are my hopes, dreams and (cough,cough) resolutions for 2012.

I hope the Mayans were wrong.

The motto, Be Positive – Be Healthy – Be Active, stays for another year.

I mean really, how can I not strive for those things.

And instead of hard fast resolutions I’m taking the easy (chickensh*t) way out this year. I’m giving myself a little breathing room and taking some baby steps.

So here we go:

1. Less elevators – It’s probably the only exercise I’ll get this year unless Evelyn succeeds in getting me back into a gym.

2. Less sweets – They’re a weakness and I probably need a 12 step program to kick the habit because going cold turkey just ain’t happening.

3. Less fast food – it’s pretty obvious why. You drive there in a car, you order from the car, you eat in the car. All calorie intake with absolutely no output. Plus, I always order the large soda which is no less than 32oz or pure sugar and corn syrup. Can you say “Hello there diabetes”?

4. Less web surfing – I can spend hours at a time surfing the web. Just senseless, mind numbing, non productive surfing. I’ll still peruse Facebook and keep up on some of my favorite blogs but just less often. This past week I have already cancelled at least a dozen email subscriptions. 

5. More writing\blogging – In my mind I have always imagined myself being a writer of some sort. In reality? Not so much. I enjoy this blog and really need to contribute more. I know some of my posts can be a little darker in tone than I really intend them to be but I’m working on that.

6. Less procrastination – I need to do this in every aspect of my life but I’m really thinking about the writing part of my resolutions on this one. I have had several ideas for the blog this past year that I have either forgotten to write down or waited so long that the subject was out dated and no longer relevant.

7. More photography – This is one thing I truly love doing and I’m pretty good at it as well. I enjoy outdoor photography more than anything else so I plan on dusting off the camera and taking more road trips and hikes in the coming year. I also plan on posting more photos on line.

8. Reengage – Over the last year or so I have really disengaged from life and those in my life. I plan on reconciling that this year. I think that will be the best gift I can give Evelyn for our 30th wedding anniversary this year. Oh yeah, and that cruise she’s wanted to go on for the last 25 years.

 

Ok, so that’s that.

I want to leave you with one of my favorite quotes. I have used it for years to gauge where I am in my life.

 

The Good Life
Living in the place you belong,
With the people you love,
Doing the right work,
On purpose.

(from: Repacking Your Bags: Lighten Your Load for the Rest of Your Life by Richard J. Leider and David A. Shapiro)

 

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "Love Spoken Here" from "Mitakuye Oyasin Oyasin/All My Relations" by "The Neville Brothers"

Looking back on 2011

My motto for the last 2 years has been “Be Positive – Be Healthy – Be Active”.

How did that go?

Fail-Fail-Fail.

But hey, there’s always next year.

How did I do on last year’s resolutions (or rules as I called them)?

No elevators – fail

No sweets – fail

Drink more water & less soft drinks – fail

Less drama – fail

 

I think I’m in trouble here.

 

 

While writing this I was listening to "Falling" from "Falling - Discovery Download" by "Iration"

Books I Read In 2011

1. 2BR02B by Kurt Vonnegut Jr
2. A Box of Matches by Nicholson Baker
3. A Piggly Wiggly Christmas by Rob Dalby
4. A Piggly Wiggly Wedding by Robert Dalby
5. A Special Place: The Heart of a Dark Matter by Peter Straub
6. After the Thin Man: Classic Movies on the Radio by Lux Radio Theatre, William Powell and Myrna Loy (Audio)
7. All Facts Considered: The Essential Library of Inessential Knowledge by Kee Malesky
8. An Amish Portrait: Song of a People by Merle Good
9. An Arsonist's Guide to Writers' Homes in New England by Brock Clarke (Audio)
10. Big Appetite: My Southern-Fried Search for the Meaning of Life by Sam McLeod
11. By Tobias Wolff: The Barracks Thief
12. F**k It: The Ultimate Spiritual Way by John C. Parkin
13. Go the F**k to Sleep by Adam Mansbach and Ricardo Cortés
14. Go with Me: A Novel by Castle Freeman
15. God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian by Kurt Vonnegut and Neil Gaiman
16. Half a Life: A Memoir by Darin Strauss
17. I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
18. John Dies at the End by David Wong
19. Jokers Club by Gregory Bastianelli
20. Killing the Black Dog: A Memoir of Depression by Les A. Murray
21. Kissing Babies at the Piggly Wiggly by Robert Dalby
22. Merry Christmas from . . .: 150 Christmas Cards You Wish You'd Received by Karen Robert
23. No One Cares What You Had for Lunch: 100 Ideas for Your Blog by Margaret Mason
24. One of Our Thursdays Is Missing: A Novel by Jasper Fforde
25. Poke the Box by Seth Godin
26. Postmark by Samantha Chase
27. Sh*t My Dad Says by Justin Halpern
28. The Accident: A Thriller by Linwood Barclay
29. The Angel of Terror by Edgar Wallace (Audio)
30. The Butterfly Effect: How Your Life Matters by Andy Andrews
31. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button by F. Scott Fitzgerald
32. The Death Instinct by Jed Rubenfeld
33. The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
34. The Invention of Hugo Cabret by Brian Selznick
35. The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch and Jeffrey Zaslow
36. The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake by Aimee Bender
37. This Book Is Overdue!: How Librarians and Cybrarians Can Save Us All by Marilyn Johnson
38. Three by Ted Dekker
39. Time for Outrage: Indignez-vous! by Stéphane Hessel
40. To-Do Lists of the Dead by Jonathan Katz
41. Train Dreams: A Novella by Denis Johnson
42. Troublemaker 2 by Janet Evanovich
43. Velocity by Dean Koontz
44. Waltzing at the Piggly Wiggly by Robert Dalby
45. What the Hell Are You Doing?: The Essential David Shrigley
46. Yiddish for Dogs: Chutzpah, Feh!, Kibbitz, and More: Every Word Your Canine Needs to Know by Janet Perr